Sunday, April 3, 2011
The year after Dad died
My mother, Elizabeth Joan Bionaz Baker, was half Italian and at times would show the hot Italian temper. My father, James Edward Baker Jr, was the more calming influence in the home. When I was 16 and a Jr in High School my father died. He went to sleep and never woke up, my mother found his cold body when she went to bed later. I was left in the house with 2 hot tempered Italians, my mom and my younger brother. Unfortunately the other brother near by also could be hot tempered at times. I knew shortly after my father died that my younger brother blamed himself for dad's death. now of course my brother did not kill my father, but as a somewhat rebellious teenager he wasn't all that cooperative around the house. My brother felt that had he been more helpful and less rebellious our dad would not have died. then years later I found out that my mom had also blamed herself for my dad's death because she had given him a mild muscle relaxer before he went to bed. he had been complaining of pain in his shoulder and she thought he had just pulled a muscle or something. In 1975 they did not know all that much about heart disease, which was what killed him. During the next year life was not very good as my mom and brother would get into a fight of some sort.There were times my mom would be so scared of my younger brother that she would come and get me and we would leave the house. There were also times I would get so scared that I feared for my own safety. Sometimes she would called and have my older brother come over,, but that didn't always help because now there were 3 hot tempered people in the house. Eventually things quieted down and my mom and younger brother got along again. They say time heals, but sometimes during that time life can be a nightmare or even a living hell.